Dear Stomach, Head, and Heart:

      PLEASE stop flipping out and hurting every time you think about summer. I realize that you have some extreme mixed emotions about it, but I need you to calm the fuck down. Nothing has happened yet and there are still 20 days until you even get there so chill. Stomach, you are not a gymnast so stop doing somersaults. Head, you also are not a Olympic runner so stop racing through non substantial thoughts. And finally, Heart, I know you are hurting from that break 4 months ago, but you need to just rest it, lift it up, and cool it down or else it really will not heal. 

                                           Love, 

                                            The Rest of Your Body

Live at Red Bull Arena

I sometimes get a little cloudy eyed when I am listening to the live recording of Dispatch at RedBull Area in Harrison, NJ. This is because I tend to think of all the amazing people in my life who were at that concert and the beautiful music that they played. I then think of how there were people at that concert that I had no idea who they were at the time of the concert but have made a large influence in my life since. I think it is absolutely fantastic to think that there is possibly someone who was at that concert that I have yet to meet and could be the largest part of my life in the future. This seemed to have already happened last summer when I met Pete. He was at the red bull concert and at that time I could have ran  him over and wouldn't have known who he was.  But now, I know this person more than I know some of my closest friends. Amazing how things work out.

This was just a rant. I miss camp people and all their love for dispatch.

Horribly Homesick.

I never thought that I would be one to be homesick, but I am right now more than ever- homesick. I'm not homesick for necessarily the structure of my house, but the people who live inside of it and around it. Basically, I am homesick for New Jersey: all of it.

I wrote a post about all the things I would miss when I went to Vermont around this time last year. Here are some highlights from the post.

"I will miss the smell of low tide.
I will miss the luxury of having the beach so close to me.
I will miss the aroma of late spring when you can just feel summer coming.
I will miss the lack of snow when it is most convenient.
I will miss lighthouses.
I will miss the smell of the rain because I know it's different anywhere else.
I will miss the "ugly" pitch pines that line the parkway and are virtually everywhere I look.
I will miss Wawas (oh SO much)
I will miss things I didn't think I'd miss probably. "

These are the things that have hit me the hardest in the "missing" department. To help with my homesickness I have decided to make a list of things I want to do when I am back in NJ.

1. I STILL need to see the sunrise over the ocean.
2. I want to go to the beach
3. I want to walk up the Barnegat lighthouse
4. I want to have tea/lunch at CoolBeans (I do this just about every time I am home- but that's why I like it)
5. I want to take a bike ride around town
6. I want to do some spring cleaning in my house on a sunny slightly breezy day.
7. I want to visit my high school.
8. I want to have a Mother-daughter day. Just me and my mama bear.
9. I want to have an awesome birthday.


-----Things I need to do----
- go to the doctors for my camp physical
- go to the dentist to get my permanent retainers.
- get my car fixed.
-----------------------------------

However, I am in a predicament. I come home late on Tuesday night (May 7th) and then am only home for 4 1/2 days until I have to go up to Lake George on Mothers day for a practicum for class(May 12th-17th). It seems I just have so much to do before I go to camp on the 20th of May for the summer (well there are a few days off in there.)

Well, there are only 14 more days until I come home and leave the Green Mountain State behind me for a long time. Is it sad that I am actually excited to not return for a while? Eh, that's life.

Ready for the End.

As of today, there are only 3 full weeks left in the semester until the end of finals. That also means that there are only 3 weeks for me to complete a long laundry list of assignments, 3 weeks left to spend with the friends I've made here at GMC, 3 weeks to pack up everything into my car, 3 weeks until I finish my freshman year of college. However, on the brighter side of things in about 3 weeks I will be on my way to Jersey, in 3 weeks I will no longer have the stress of school on my shoulders, in three weeks it will be my birthday and I get to spend the day with Julie and my family, in 3 weeks I will be starting a new chapter in my book of life. Now when I balance these two scenarios in my head, three weeks dosen't sound too bad.

I am looking forward to seeing my family and friends in such a short period of time.